Inter-Faith Jamboree

I had mentioned that the dad called concerned that my blog was right wing fundamentalist insensitive and my life was becoming more and more precarious with every entry. He was bemoaning that the spread and influence of evangelicalism in Canada was moving swifter than the bubonic plague and I laughed that in that one department, we're ten steps ahead of them and happy to be of service. Remember Snozzle and the Grimsby Pentacostals, dad? Well they came back last week for a reunion tour. Seems they don't pull a crowd up north like they do here in BIM. We know quality entertainment.

I'm one of those parents that bring my kid late to school every day. I roll up with Prince blasting- compliments of my radio show feeling my needs- and drop the boy off in time to miss the greater portion of the morning praise. I pretend I can't press fast enough to make the bell but the truth is, I'm busy giving my son his morning lesson in theology. The teaching method is a passive one but IZ is catching on quickly. So when Snozzle returned he wisely inquired, "But why mummy- why do dey only always talk about Jesus? Jesus Jesus Jesus! Jesus Jesus Jesus! Always Jesus!"

Yesterday, the Nation printed a picture of a 600 pastey man parade of nerdy middle aged Canadians jumping for Jesus in Bridgetown. These Jesus Jesus Jesus fanatics are island hopping under the pretence that by acting shamefully obnoxious in sweaty short pants and straw hats, they are deseminating some kind of good news. It's a "working" vacation, if you qualify doing a Jesus congo line working, more than likely financed by the tithes of some fools left behind in the cold. It struck me however, that with all the talk about love and acceptance maybe these Christians wouldn't mind extending an invitation to the jamboree on a wider scale. Not to mention the tourist dollars we could rake in with my plan of inter-faith gesticulation.

To the 600 crazy Canadian fundamentalists let's add 600 Islam extremists in full hijab regalia, 600 wailing Jews with 600 peenee peenee hats, 600 Asian Budhists, 600 Wican Nudists and 600 Harry Krishna's with 600 tambourines. We'll have them jump and wave their way into our newly renovated Independence Square where we'll have prize winning contests like Which Team can Scream their Saviour's Name the Loudest or Who Can Balance their Scripture on their Head while Crossing the Swing Bridge?. We'll taste each other's sacraments and we'll sing a medley of Haleh Haleh songs and we'll laugh and hug and have a merry old time.

BTA- you gotta pick this up-